Dear…

I don’t know your experience and you don’t know mine. The truth is no one knows what you’ve been through and no one knows what you’re feeling but you. No one knows what I’ve been through and no one knows what I’m feeling except me. I choose to let people see a glimpse of my true Self, but that’s all it is, a glimpse. That’s all we ever see of each other: a glimpse. I see the world through my own glasses, based on almost 32 years of events and lessons learned. I know I’m right just as you know you’re right and we’re both right.

I try to live my life consciously, with intention, being present with every moment. It’s not perfect and it takes constant effort, but it’s worth it. I don’t want to spend my days wishing for them to end or only believing that I will feel at peace when and if something comes my way. I choose to spend each moment in the here and now because that’s the only thing that exists in this world. This moment. And now we’re on to the next moment. What I choose to think, what I choose to stay, how I choose to act matters. If I focus on what I did in the past or on a reality that is not mine, I will begin to believe that I’m helpless, that I’m powerless.

Sadly these are the two words that I’ve heard a lot of this week. The people that I serve, adults, adolescents, questioning the state of their world. These people are my mirror, they are a direct reflection of how I feel right now. Helpless. Powerless.

People have come to me this week for support for guidance and I find myself just as confused as they are. I find myself triggered by their tears as I have tears in my own. I find myself questioning how I’m going to respond, which is not something that I typically do. The truth is I don’t know what to say. So I’m doing what I believe to be what’s needed and that is simply Being. I sit and I’m opening my ears offering a safe space, a sacred space for these beautiful beings to share, to cry, to allow their heart to bleed open.

I know that I cannot do the work that I meant to do if I am in my own head or in my own heart. So I open myself up and I allow myself to try to put on the glasses of the other person, the glasses that they see their world with. I put my glasses to the side knowing that I can return to them and I consciously choose to see the world through their eyes.

This is empathy. This is what the world needs more of. A willingness to not ignore another’s suffering, to not ignore the pain of our neighbors, to not ignore the pain of any living Being. A willingness to recognize the pain and suffering of others as our own pain and suffering. When we are able to put our glasses down and see the world through the eyes of someone else, we hurt. This is the pain that we often ignore because ignorance is bliss. (And we all desire bliss and that’s ok).

The work that I devote my life to is sitting with people’s suffering, their pain. Giving each beautiful Being the time and the space to bleed themselves open if they need to, to shed fears by offering them to me. What a gift.

I don’t believe that words are useless, but I do believe in walking my talk. I cannot speak of peace and consciousness and love if I do not allow these things to guide me in all areas of my life. And it’s hard. It can be fucking brutal. But I am grateful.

I am grateful for the ability to put my glasses down. I am grateful for holding a vessel for others to bleed their hearts into. I’m grateful for empathy. I’m grateful for the dark because it forces us to see our fears. When the world is truly dark, ignorance no longer becomes bliss, it becomes dangerous. I don’t want to be fumbling around in the dark not knowing who’s standing beside me. So I choose to stand beside all that I can. I stand with the people I serve, my family, my friends, my neighbors, but most importantly I stand with people whose glasses are very different from my own. Because I do believe in love I believe the purest form of power lies in love. Just ask Harry Potter (yes I relate my life to Harry Potter).

I don’t know what today holds, but as I was driving to my office this morning I found myself listening to the Black Eyed Peas song Where is the Love? And I found myself crying. The line “children hurting children crying” really got to me. And I think it gets to a lot of people.

So instead of putting more darkness out there; instead of fueling anger, hatred, fear, I choose to fuel love. Instead of wishing and planning on running away and leaving this country because I just can’t stand it anymore, I choose Love. I choose to be a light in darkness. I choose acceptance. I choose consciousness. I choose trust. I choose to stand with all Beings. I choose to be present. I choose to pick my baby up every time she cries because I am eternally grateful that I am able to do that. There are many moms who have lost this ability because their children have been taken from them. My heart aches for them because their pain and suffering is my own. Because like the Black Eyed Peas say “we only got one world and there’s something wrong with it.” And I don’t want to be that something. 

Now on the next moment.

I am writing this blog with light and love. Take what works for you and leave the rest. May you awaken to your Self, connect with your inner light, and integrate consciousness. May you feel peace. May you trust your Self. Blessings. 

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